Whatever
The great console debate is just the tech world’s version of toddlers fighting over action figures. One person swears their PlayStation is clearly superior, while another screams that Xbox is objectively the best, and PC gamers just smirk from their $3,000 RGB thrones like, “Oh, you peasants and your 30 fps.” Meanwhile, the Nintendo fans are off in the corner, blissfully unbothered, playing Animal Crossing on a toaster if they have to—because fun doesn’t need specs.
And then there’s the wildcard squad: the Raspberry Pi wizards running every retro game ever made on a device the size of a Pop-Tart, the handheld emulation nerds with enough portable consoles to open a museum, and the “I built my own arcade cabinet” folks who technically win just by sheer dedication and woodworking skills. Somehow, I end up fitting into quite a few of these categories. Eep.
But here’s the hilarious truth: at the end of the day, most of the games we argue about are cross-platform anyway. “Exclusives” are just corporate bait to keep us bickering while they count our subscription money. The real winner? Anyone having fun. Whether you’re playing Elden Ring on a PS5, a toaster, or a Tamagotchi mod, if you’re enjoying it, you’re doing it right.
So next time someone tries to “well, actually…” you about teraflops or frame rates, just smile and say, “Cool story. Anyway, I’ve got Stardew Valley to play on my fridge.”
P.S. If your “console” is literally a potato with wires, you might be overcommitting to the bit.
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