Schoolyard Advice: Keep Your Frenemies Closer
Friends & Frenemies: A Survival Guide
Friends are the people who’ve seen you at your best (like brunch in pajamas) and your worst (think post-breakup karaoke to I Will Survive). They’re the ones who’d bail you out of jail but would also happily post the incriminating video evidence for laughs. Then there are frenemies, those baffling creatures who smile sweetly at your face while silently judging your life choices in the group chat. You know the type: the one who says, “You’re so brave for wearing that!” with just a little too much emphasis, or the one who accidentally forgets to invite you to the party but makes sure you see all the tagged photos.
A true friend shows up with soup when you’re sick; a frenemy shows up with soup… and a backhanded compliment like, “You’d look amazing with bangs!” (knowing full well you’d resemble a startled poodle). Friends cheer, “You got this!” while frenemies mutter, “Wow, you actually got this?” Friends share their fries without hesitation; frenemies give you that look and ask, “Are you sure you want fries?”
But let’s be honest—frenemies are the unsung heroes of your personal growth. Nothing lights a fire under you like the quiet rage of proving someone wrong. That subtle smirk when they doubt you? Rocket fuel. That passive-aggressive “Good for you!” when you mention your new promotion? Pure motivation. Frenemies don’t just push buttons—they smash them like a toddler with a keyboard, accidentally composing the symphony of your success.
Think about it: Would you have crushed that job interview, run that 5K, or finally learned to make sourdough without the unspoken rivalry? Probably not. Frenemies are the universe’s way of saying, “Oh, you think you’re done? Here’s someone to outshine.” And honestly? Thank them. Send them a fruit basket after you land your dream job. Tag them in your gym selfies. Let their silent seething be the wind beneath your wings.
So, cherish your ride-or-die friends, but keep a framed screenshot of your frenemy’s skeptical text as a reminder: You’re capable of far more than you—or they—ever imagined. Now go forth, thrive out of spite, and remember—the best revenge isn’t just living well… it’s making sure they have to watch. 🚀🔥
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